nobody else likes you.

i have known someone (we'll call him "ding dong") for about a year.  background: ding dong considers himself to be a black belt in hitting on the womens.  a modern day casanova.  a black belt in making the ladies faint with ecstasy.  oh, and he's married with kids.  he waved me over, and i knew within seconds that today was finally my lucky day to be wooed by this sweet-talking panties melter.  "hey..." he said.  he licked his lips and nodded at me.  "so uh... me and the wife are talking about getting separated, so i'm practically single.  none of the other guys here think you're attractive, so... want to hang out sometime?  you can make me breakfast this weekend".

i had to brace myself to avoid swooning, and it wasn't because his sweet talk had swept me off my feet.  it was because i realized he wasn't kidding.  i waited at least a full minute with my mouth open, waiting for an explanation.  none came.  i finally said "i'm sorry... was that a compliment"?

"yeah.  i just wanted you to know i have no competition," said ding dong.

sigh.

lesson for guys: telling a girl that nobody thinks she's attractive is NOT a compliment.